|m y f a i r y t a l e e n d i n g |

2005-11-29T13:21:00.000+08:00

Sweetheart;

I can't give you the solutions to all of life's
problems,doubts, or fears.
But I can listen to you, and together we
can seek answers.

I can't change your past with all it's
heartache and pain, nor the future with
it's untold stories. But I can be there now
when you need me to care.

I can't keep your feet from stumbling.
I can only offer my hand that you may
grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes, and
happinesses are not mine; Yet I can
share in your laughter and joy.

Your decisions in life are not mine to
make, nor to judge;I can only support
you, encourage you, and help you
when you ask.

I can't give you boundaries which I have
determined for you,But I can give you
the room to change, room to grow,
room to be yourself.

I can't keep your heart from breaking
and hurting,
But I can cry with you and help you pick
up the pieces and put them back in
place .....

remember that I'll always love you;
right from the start.

2005-11-07T09:50:00.000+08:00

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri
wahahaha!!

2005-10-21T13:46:00.000+08:00

thanks sweetheart for the anniversary cake. hehs. =)

2005-09-23T23:56:00.000+08:00

just got back from town.
woke up around 1 plus, then went off to meet sweetheart and his friends.
will be the last seeing them anyways.
so yeah i tagged along.

headed to meet Alan first at Citylink.
then meet up with sweetheart and Endy.
walked around Suntec, till around 7 plus and we headed to Marina.
went to eat at Fin's.
very full. really.
thanks sweetheart!
cuz i was hungry like crazy by the time we ordered.
and i want more Famous Amos.
it melts u okie. haha.

here's a snapshot of Alan @ Fin's..

before i forget, tmr is Shikin's 2 year birthday!!
happy birthday babygirl!!

snapshot of Shikin and me..

going to go for Winning-11's soccer match tmr.
meeting sweetheart at Marsiling at dunno-wat-time.
hahaha.

okie, shall blog thier victory tmr.
god bless them. hahaha =)

2005-09-21T21:21:00.000+08:00

sweetheart changed his blog address courtesy of his sweet innocent lil girlfriend here.
haha. klah klah.
what would i do without you to make my day right?
-bluek-
anyway, his bro got me a shoe. so thanks for that.
appreciate it loads.
and thanks dear for the Zara spag top.
appreciate it even more.

don't have any real plans for tmr.
jus gonna be having my prac at BBDC.
then off to meet Chris and sweetheart to study for their exams.

Sarahcuzzin: sorry can't join you to club tmr night.
i promise when i'm fully loaded with loads of Jaguars, i'll go ok?
haha. kidding. enjoy yourself yeah cuzzin.
missing ya.. =)
Fad: where's my sambal stingray that u promised from Newton?? confirm asap lah. i wanna EATTTT.
Winning 11: i'll go this saturday to watch you all lah ok. stop bugging me. lol. play your best alryte?

just wanna blog a picture of sweetheart.

..find it cute. lol. =)

ok.. time to hit the TV.
..and to beg sweetheart to start studying for his papers.
lol. nites.

2005-09-20T17:07:00.000+08:00

going to upload some photos.

these are the photos for the previous sunday, before i had my Tourism Exams.
went out with sweetheart and his 'Winning 11" teamates to Suntec, Espalnade & Fort Canning.
had a nice evening out with them.
sweetheart's bro fetch me and sweetheart to Suntec.
thanks a lot yea! =)

''Look @ Farhan and Alan.. they're having the same pose! ''

Thanks Alastair for the photos.. though not all photos were being updated.
Good Luck to you guys for the exams yea.
And good luck in your future attachment life, it's going to be hard but good things come after great preseverence.
Gonna miss these rowdy guys!
Take Care ya! See you guys soon!! =)

Photobucket

2005-09-20T13:49:00.000+08:00

This is a test post from Photobucket.com

2005-09-16T22:49:00.000+08:00

just got back not too long ago.
been having my exams since Monday.
Tourism paper is definately hard. Harder than i expected.
went to watch ''The Cave'' with sweetheart after the paper.
Anyways, English wasn't that bad, although the 500 essay came as a shock to me. LOL.
didn't know the paper consist of a 500 word essay.
MicroEconomics is a killer. maybe i just hate numbers. wadeve.
Housekeeping is not that bad.
After that, went to do my iBook with sweetheart.
thanks sweetheart for accompanying me.
I know you're dead tired. keke.
But i'm stubborn and wanted it anyways.
and yeah, glad you've finish all your projects and assignments already.
time to study hard for your upcoming papers alryte?
and get a hotel soon. keke.
tmr Hospitality Law paper. Open book and Close book exam.
oh well, gonna at least try for it.
gonna be doing my Front Office project tmr at Derline's house.
then might be going over to Daddy's hse for the night.
hmms..
think i'm gonna sleep soon..
nites all..

2005-09-15T03:11:00.000+08:00

..it doesn't pay to be too nice.

really.

2005-09-06T00:56:00.000+08:00

i don't want to give the kitten up.
yea, i know i'm not the one taking care of it, but she just gives us the sentimental value.
i know our relationship is worth more than her, but the times i spent just to search for a kitten, takes a lot of energy and time.
just goes to show how far i'll go in our relationship.
but i can't change your mind, i know i can't.
i'm sorry to have spoiled your day, i'm really sorry.
but i can't control my emotions.
she's what we talked about every night.
how she's becoming so clever, how she runs about, and how she would play with the telephone wire, sometimes cutting our conversation.
we could stay awake just talking about her, we could even stay awake to jokingly quarrelled who you love more; me or her.
i'll miss her and i'm missing her.
just like i'm missing you when you're not your usual self.
and i know it's a tough choice for you too.
sometimes; in the most difficult situations, you'll began to realise how much he means to you.
to me, you're my forever.
..i'll always love you.
i promise.

2005-09-03T10:47:00.000+08:00

-yawns-
just woke up. overnight at Jie's house yesterday night.
before that i met up with sweetheart to town.
and then to CCK.
thanks for everything yesterday dear.
anyway, we didn't really do much as both of us were very tired.
slept around 5am yesterday.
was using the laptop halfway and fell asleep at her couch.
was so tired that i feel like falling asleep again.
Jie's going to do her project today at Bugis at around 1230.
i'm not sure whther i'm going over to sweetheart's soccer.
feeling very tired.
felt a flu coming too.
been having headache since yesterday but i thought i could sleep it tru.
still having it now and my chest kindda hurt.
wahh. feel so sick. haha.
anyway, i've no energy to even sit up properly.
might not be meeting sweetheart today too as he's going clubbing today.
oh well, i think i need a good saturday to sleep and rest.
today's mom's bdae too and might be going out to dinner.
HAPPy bdae Mom.
HAPPY bdae to sweetheart's friend, Fairus too!
Have a great weekend ahead.
going off to bathe! mwuahs.

2005-08-28T21:58:00.000+08:00

been a long time since i've blogged.

been busy with projects.

been having these stress-up feeling when projects and assignments not completed.

failed my Business Law too.

retaking it seems so nonsense.

coz i dunno if it's worth my time.

arghh. -faints-

been coming home late all these while.

with mum nagging and such, being at home can be really be a bore.

maybe just one day, with all these happening all at one time, i might just break down.

really felt like being alone.

hais. really felt so tired and wired up.

maybe i just need a new life.

maybe he's the only one that can put a smile on my face again.

and only my jie and cuzins can make me feel wanted again.

love you guys. love you sweetheart, though the one that you love the most, hurts you the most.

2005-08-15T00:56:00.000+08:00

as i sat and think of you, i reflect on the past memories together.

how we laughed and smiled together.

how i've cried and the hugs you gave to calm me down.

how jealousy always gets into the way.

how insecure i get when you're not by my side.

those moments when you played with my hair.

and how i fell asleep on your shoulder.

the times you teased me when i've manage to came in at least 7th place while playing your psp.

those times when i gave you a stupid smile and trying to get your attention when you're ignoring me and continuously playing your game.

the times when i gave you a symphathetic face when i've made you mad.

and the times i put on my puppy eyes and waiting for you to get me the hp i wanted or the cute teddy bear that i saw.

to this,

i made a promise to myself.

that i'll be faithful to you forever.

and of coz, i know i'm the cause of your every hurt.

and a simple sorry won't change a thing.

i'll mend my ways, as long as it'll make you happy.

and i never want to lose you sweetheart.

i'm loving you every single day and moment of my life.

thank you for loving me.

my precious, your princess awaits you.

...till eternity.

2005-08-14T03:22:00.000+08:00

-yawns-

just got home.

haha.

thought i'll be spending saturday at home but being me, i went out.

honey called me up around 4.30pm and agreed to meet at CityHall at 6pm.

waited for him.

hmph.

then we went Suntec cuz Fairus went to work and we went Mac to tapau food and eat outside.

thought of joining his bro eat at Swensons but then we decided to watch The Maid.

went to catch the midnight slot at CCK.

the storyline wasn't that scary but the suspense is there.

certain parts really shocked me.

then took cab home.

then honey called me up.

gonna sleep soon.

tata!

2005-08-12T23:37:00.000+08:00

just got back from CCK.

godness; i'm so tired.

oh well, guess what?

i didn't attend class today.

gonna get another 1 demerit point.

arghhh.

what is wrong with me this semester.

i just can't seemed to wake up.

i'm like so dead tired from everything.

but i went back to school to get a form from Admin.

and my camera from sweetheart.

and of coz; to meet my lovely grp mates.

Amelia and Rebecca drove us to Chinatown.

went to eat at Maxwell Hawker Centre and drove to Hotel1929.

took a video and plenty of pictures from 3 cameras.

my god!!

the staff there are so friendly.

wouldn't mind working with them for their new 6 star hotel.

"Majestic".

woo. sounds so magical.

wanted to upload the pictures but my cable for the camera is at sweetheart's hme.

alryte,after filming 1929, our grp went seperate ways.

Amelia dropped off Derline and Jaclyn while me and Alison went off to BB in Rebecca's car.

then Alison and me took the train.

went to post sweetheart's resume before heading to CCK.

wanted to catch a movie The Maid but it's aat 11.40pm and i didn't want to go home so late.

so instead we spend a quiet time together.

-yawns-

tmr's gonna be a very relaxing saturday as for once in my life, i'm not going out tmr.

sweetheart's gonna be doing his project or Citylink or wherever he is going.

and i think i'm gonna revise for Tourism Test which is on Tuesday.

and which i noe nothing about. haha.

..and of coz! it means catching up on my beauty sleep!!

gonna wait for sweetheart to call me before turning in.

but i'm such a sleepy-head that sometymes..

..i

.....just

........doze....

off....

nites all..

2005-08-10T21:57:00.000+08:00

went to watch Stealth last sunday.

i find it so boring that i talked a lot during the movie.

feeling so cold too in the theater.

had dear to hug me and i fell asleep during the movie.

had Tourism till 6 plus on Monday.

but i was looking forward to my Tuesday break, so it wasn't all that bad.

went to eat at Cartel on Tuesday at Marina.

then dear wanted to watch the fly-past so we waited at Marina for it.

after that went to Esplanade for the fireworks.

i don't know how to feel.

i'm so lost.

i don't want to lose you.

and i'll never love any1 else.

as i've given all the love i have to give to you.

dear, i love you... =(

anyway, thanks dear for the cab fare home.

... i'll love you till forever.

picture perfect you and me.

..hais..

2005-08-07T02:56:00.000+08:00

woke up around 1pm today as i thought that i would have to go down CCK first.
but honey's bro fetch me at Simei ard 4 plus and we headed off to his bro's gf hse at Bedok.
after that his sister's bf came and we went up honey's bro's gf hse.
isn't it confusing? lol.

while waiting for honey's bro's friends, we watched vcds.
anyways, we later headed off to Tjg Rhu to watch the firewerks.
it was nice and lasted for a long time.
cooling air and windy breeze makes it so romantic.
haha. but how romantic can it be with a whole bunch of his family rite?
but it was fun and they were a noisy lot. keke.

we then headed to honey's bro's friend hse at Marsiling to watch Bewitched.
i dozed off halfway but honey kept moving so i was woken up by him.
it's kindda easy to get along with them coz they love to laugh.
haha.

anyways, we went off around 2am and his sister's bf hse is in Tampines so we headed there first.
then his bro sent me to Simei before sending his gf.
btw, all of us stay in the east.
keke.
honey sent me up to my house cuz i was scared of the 7th month. haha.
thanks sweetheart.

they must be otw hme to CCK by now.
anyways, thanks to honey, his bro, his bro gf, his sister, his sister gf and his bro's friends for making my saturday nite so wonderful!

btw, i took my sweetheart's psp home. haha.
luv you lots sweetheart. mwuah.
better sleep now; gotta meet him for a movie later.

nites all..

2005-08-05T11:26:00.000+08:00

was freaking late for school today.
woke up around 8am today.
even if i took cab to sch, i would still be late cuz sch's at 9am.
oh well, skipped 2 slots today and coming for project work today.
as well as passing some notes for my sister.

yesterday night wasn't all nice.
the hurt stayed with me as i tossed in bed and tried my best to sleep.
in the end i took panadol cold and antibiotics with another flu pill.
which of coz, is the main cause of today's lateness.
oh well.

..sometymes e one u luv most is e one who hurts u e most.

going off to school now.
take care my friends.

2005-08-04T19:41:00.000+08:00

finally, tomorrow is Friday.

finally the weekend is drawing near.

tomorrow's gonna be a short, really short day at sch compared to today which starts at an early time of 9am to 6pm.

anyway, wanna thanked Glenda for saving me from getting caught in the rain today. haha.

gum sia.

anyway, i hate taking the train early in the morning.

people are just plain irritating me. why must they read the newspaper when the train is currently soooo crowded? bumping the newspaper on my head.

it's really not so nice being on the shorter side.

besides that, Singaporean men have bad manners.

a lady got up from a seat right in front of me, and guess what? a short, fat, chinese man from a verrrrrrry far corner just bumped right at me and took the seat.

omg. lucky i didn't fell in my heels.

i shot him a look of disgust.

Singaporean men have really no manners.

and they're not gentleman at all.

such a disgrace.

oh well, projects are coming up. increasing by the day.

Tourism Part II, Front Office Operations, Housekeeping Operations, Hospitality Law and MicroEconomics.

i think that should be it.

..i hope.

gonna do project tmrw but ending early around 2pm as most of them would be doing their other individual asignments.

btw, i slept tru yesterday. woke up around midnight and went back to sleep after taking my medicine.

DTM's classroom is like an igloo.

so cold that by the last slot today, my brain wasn't functioning anymore.

goodness.

gonna bathe, watch tv and do my notes for Front Office as there will be a test on Monday.

yesh. Monday.

well, it's okie.

there's no school on Tuesday.

..hmm, and i miss my dear..

..blueek.

have a nice weekend! =)

2005-07-31T01:34:00.000+08:00

left my hse around 2plus to meet my stepmom and family.
talked awhile and took them to NTUC.
after that i got them into a cab before i took e train to meet my precious.

waited for him at City Hall.

sms-ed him and told him i was at City Hall; though i think he went Somerset first.
oh well, you said City Hall anyways.

then went Marina.

saw Shima and her boyfriend at the Foodcourt.
they're so cute together. =)

walked around for some place to eat.

then we went Swensons instead.

after that we went Esplanade to watch the fireworks.

kind of celebrating our early anniversary together.

wonderful fireworks.

but it was more than wonderful as i was watching it with the one i love.

thanks my dear.

and sorry to adrian and jac for not following to go clubbing.

was out with him and it was a special day so didn't go club in the end.

then went CCK before i proceed home.

anyway dear..

beneath the stars and the fireworks; i was touched.

touched by you and the things you did for me.

time and time again i made you mad, i made you sad,

and yet time and time again you forgave me and gave me a chance.

how i wished that for every mistake i had made, will not be repeated again.

and so beneath the stars tonight; i was sure i wanted you to be the one.

..the one that will hold my hand til eternity; and never let me go.

and be the one that will be by my side til my dying day.

..dear, you're special to me.

thanks for the diamond ring honeypie.

and;

..sweetheart; i love you.

*kisses. smooches. hugs.*

2005-07-25T21:30:00.000+08:00

for the past few days, she's been sad.
she love her family, love her friends, loves her boyfriend.
she hope they do too.

she's feeling so emotional these days.
trying to figure out if life's all worth it.
however she didn't cry.

saturday night she didn't get to see one of the wonders that lights up the sky.
sunday afternoon she didn't get to see the person she love most.
she misses him.
but didn't dare to say it.
fearful that he might think that she's dependable on him.
she loves him until she didn't know how to let him go if he chooses to let her go.

sunday night she received news that her aunt is in terrible condition in Gleneagles Hospital.
she felt so sad.
cancer is a word she hate to hear now.
if only she could give her life up to her aunt.
she loves her aunt so dearly and seeing her in pain breaks her heart.
..still;
she didn't cry.

class wasn't all that boring today.
made the course tutor upset.
the whole class felt bad.
her friend fell ill and had to go back.
she felt so sad.
..still holding on..
she didn't cry.

she got home and it was raining.
knowing full well it was unsafe to walk in the rain, she continued her journey home.
despite hating to get wet, she walked tru the rain.
finally the tears came rolling down.
the rain hid her uncontrollable tears.

she wondered, she pondered.
she loves him.
she needs him.
where is he now that she needs him badly?

silently she continues to cry inside her heart.
where tears could not be seen; yet could be felt.

2005-07-24T02:00:00.000+08:00

Fad called and woke me up ard 6.15am on an early saturday morning.
dragged myself out of my comfortable bed and went to bathe.
left the hse around 7.15am. met adrian on the way there.
he forced me wear that kuku t-shirt. LOL.
gosh the shirt was BIG on me LOL.
reached Chinatown and register and took attendance. started the race at 9am.
the 1st place my group went was to EAT. LOL.
then we went around for about 2 hrs or so. we went in ScarLet Boutique HoteL and yeah, i stole a towel from the toilet.
LOL. the rate there is much more expensive than the 1929 Boutique Hotel.
oh yah, guess wat. me and my grp were sitting down feeling so damn hot becoz of the sun,when a photographer shot us in action.
oh my. i must have looked like i've just won a race or something. LOL.
ok, then after Scarlet Hotel, we decided to cheat and took cab to Labrador Park.
guess what again? it rained. and we then took cab to Galib's hse at Tiong Bahru.
then Ms Cheryl Tok smsed us and asked us to meet her at Labrador Park again.
so, we took a cab back to Labrador. such a waste of $$. argh.
then, guess what again???!!!!
...it rained.
and Ms Tok finally said that we need not go back to the finishing point as it was raining very heavily.
i was so pissed off. argh. argh.
then tok 408 back to Harbourfront and went there to eat.
saw Glenda's CK grp there. LOL. they didn't go back either.
reached home around 5pm and dozed off to sleep.

was woken up by Daryl's call.
he jio me go CB tonight.
LOL. told him i was shagged and DTM's going zouk tonight i think.
anyways, i'm a good gerl.
..i don't club.
*laughs*

was supposed to watch fireworks tonight but honey was werking and i noe he'll be too tired to even catch a midnite show.
oh well, i overslept too. woke up around 10pm.
was hungry, so we (my cuzzin and family) went out for supper at Bugis area.
since my aunt from KL is here in Spore, we decided to cruise around 1st before going home.
went to eat durians at Sims Avenue. was so tired after that.
..seemed to have a sore throat too.

wanted to load up the pics of the race but i can't seemed to find any DTM(s) online at this moment.
LOL. will upload it in my next entry.
oklah, think should be going to sleep now. pretty tired.
going for breakfast tmrw too.
probably meeting honey later in the afternoon too.
-yawns-
..i need sleep.

2005-07-20T19:47:00.000+08:00

school today i pretty much the same.
went off around 2.45pm and went to do our project til around 5pm.
after that i went to Airport to collect the tariff sheet for Hotel 1929.
the hotel is stylish-based. no need to go very far for a honeymoon btw. LOL.
there will be 4 slots of Business Law tmr. which means it's like 6 hours of law.
yea; really. ain't kidding.

the subject on every1's mind during class was totally regarding the blogging issue.
haha; i think i kind of know who browses tru my blog.
mostly my DTM classmates; colleagues and my ex schoolmates would read rite?
it's not as if outsiders would know my web address; unless they link it up from sum1.
anyway, my blog isn't the source for gossips or "oh this girl went there", "oh this girl is with him", "oh isn't she that sum1's gf?", "oh she often go there?", etc.
actually blogs are private. and tho it is not subjected to going public, it's still scary to think that people may "know" you just by reading your blog daily. really. it's so scary.

like they got nothing better to do.
LOL.
Get a life. hehs.

* HAPPY ADVANCE BIRTHDAY TO AIN ON THE 21ST JULY!! *
may you be blessed with happy endings and splendid memories of your sweet eighteen.
weeeeeeeeeeeee. huggies for ya! =)

sweet sugar honeycomb gummy pie;
i miss you.

blueek. =)

2005-07-19T22:50:00.000+08:00

-yawns-
i'm like feeling so robotic.
i don't feel tired at all after class. the feeling of going home late from school is "oh so natural".
sickening.
finally, recovered from e horrible flu. but having cramps tho.
argh. wadever.
school's simply ''oh so fun" these days.
anyway, didn't take cab today, although i was late for school.
i stupidly left my hp at home. only to realise that after i went up Simei's platform.

and yes; i'm so *gon-gong*

sickening.
went back home and took it. reached Bukit Batok mrt around 8.25am.
and class starting at 8.30am. *laughs*
wasn't marked late tho.
plopped my butt down to the seat and studied. *laughs.
had our first grps to present the Tourism Intergrated Resort.
she was so professional in her marking, and she sure noes her product well.
*faints. i'm so gonna die for my presentation next monday.
i'm knocking off after this. so dead tired.

[his princess] says:

" i hope we can go through everything smoothly.
i love you, and 10 years down the road, i'll still be loving you just like before.
i'm glad you've learn the value of love and sacrifice.
i've seen you grown to what you are now.
and we continue to learn, as we walk tru our lives together..
..holding hands;
..side by side;
..a gentle kiss to accompany each morning & night;
..take care of me;
..don't let me go..
..i still need you.
till forever.."
* i still do. *

2005-07-18T00:10:00.000+08:00

i will try my best to adapt to you.

i'm so sorry i was rude to you.

i'm so sorry for everything dear.

i promise i will be forever faithful to you.

i'll grant you all your wishes.

and even if your wishes are too high up; i promise to let time solve it.

but pls;

..be willing to wait.

..be willing to endure the pain.

i'm willing to be the one sacrificing everything i have.

even if it means a lot to me.

just give me time.

i need the time.

i'm sorry i can't make you happy now.

don't make me feel any sadder than i am now.

seeing you sad; will break my heart.

pls don't leave me here out cold.

..i need you.

..so dead.

2005-07-16T17:34:00.000+08:00

i'm feeling so sick.. been absent on tuesday this week, but i'm still not well yet and it's already saturday. feeling so tired and lethargic. feeling as if i've not been in bed for the past 18 years of my life. school is definately terrible. besides the long hours, the ATBS course tutors are not much of a help. Projects handups are particularly all on the same day. btw to Jac, Derline, Rebecca and the rest of my project mates, take care and get well soon you guys. it's just keeps getting worst off now that Business Law is gonna take up most of the slots for this week and the next. Assignments come rolling in like jackpot. i really hate the feeling. everyday, from monday to friday, lessons will continue on and on. hardly any break for us. caged up in the cold classrooms for hours each day, only letting us off at noon and coming back at one. then all the way till six in the evening. hardly have the time to breathe. didn't get to see honey often at school too. a quick werd and a hi and bye seems all. i miss him. all in all i miss my freedom. the freedom of having plenty of hours to sleep. plenty of hours just watching tv. of being on the phone for so long. i missed all that. weekends will be taken up by projects and assingments. hardly any time to sleep. i need sleep. i'm so frustrated with life. i can't seemed to be in a happy mood. everything is basically going downhill. i'm tired of getting sick over and over again. i'm getting irritated by the most simplest thing. getting angry at even the most ridiculous things. i'm so sorry my friends. to honey too, i'm sorry. i care a lot for you. my whole life revolves around you. i'm happy being with you and i'm gonna be the one to hold you. i love you dearly sweetheart. and i'm going to miss you. we can pull this together, you and me. arrgh. i'm so gonna miss you so much. *hugs. =(
going to get the brochures tmr morning. wanted to go today but honey says ''you're going alone?'' and yea, it's scary going alone. lol. decided to go tmr morning instead. besides, i'm feeling really tired. i realised that i can't travel for long hours in the train now. i kindda feel like puking when i see so many crowds standing before me. i don't know why. i just felt so.. claustrophobic. is that how you spelled it? oh well. maybe i should eat more. my face is so pale when i woke up this morning. simply like so dead.
i hate the life i am now. i don't wanna give up. i really don't want to. but sometimes when i'm alone and have too many things to do, i just felt like giving up. what's the point of going through all these hardships in school. it's supposed to be fun and knowledgable. not stressful and unattainable. i have my reasons if i'm quiet and unwilling to converse with you. pls don't think that i am unapprachable and unfriendly. some people just don't give a 1st good impression. and i'm so sorry if i am ever rude to anyone. i'm just so sorry. i'm kindda feeling bad about honey's friend that i scolded. geez. i was being so mean. but i just don't like people to be rude to me. i'm sorry honey. i simply hate rudeness.
arghhhhhhhhhhhhh. and i miss you. so bad...
..i love you sweetheart.

..booo.

2005-07-14T23:46:00.000+08:00

*groans.

Hospitality Law is killing me.

i can't believe she's taking like the whole week next 2 weeks for her law studies.

i can't stand her.

can't stand arrogance from her.

can't stand the way she criticise us.

how would we know so much about law anyways.

*groans.

tmr gonna be a long day.

though ending at 2.45pm; there's still projects to be handed up.

Monday 18th July 2005.

1. Tourism Intergrated Project to be handed up.

2. English Written assignment.

*yawns.

i do miss him.

but sch's gonna kill us both.

LOL.

i still have to do the civil and criminal cases for Law.

still have Microeconomics Project too.

and quiz on Monday for Front Office Operations.

i'm so dead.

and i'm so sick.

so many classmates falling sick.

there is never a day whereby every1 is present in class.

typical actually.

LOL.

oklah, have to go back on my project.

have a nice night.

*sneeze.

i wanna be by you;

2005-07-10T23:18:00.000+08:00

woke up around noon on sat. went bugis to shop with mommy and my cousin.
can get me the Escada's Lotion not honey? LOL.

after shopping, mommy and my cousin went off for dinner while i went to meet honey at City Hall to watch the fireworks near boat quay. thank you for bringing me there. appreciate it.

after that me and him went to eat at killeney as he was hungry. typical.
then head off to meet his jay chou friend at orchard.
saw kase and craven at Chinablack's queue so we jumped in.
thanks ah. haha.

went in around 10 plus. DHM peeps were there to celebrate Don's birthday.
My classmates, some went in late but those who were there were;
Jaclyn, Rebecca, Kase, Derline, Adrian, Glenda, Fayyadh, Farhan, Sarah, Dian.
The rest were from DCS and their gfs.

went home around 4 plus.
everyone's starting school tmrw.
how fun. keke.

watching "The Haunting" now. it's not boring k honey.
it's like disgusting the way they were killed.

-yawns-

long day tmr. see ya..
and thanks for the anniversary wishes. LOL.

thanks for the pig dear.
it's mine now. sorry. LOL.

i luv you;

2005-07-08T20:53:00.000+08:00

Nothing much else to blog.

School's tiring.

and projects are piling up.

..but.

Happy 4 Months Anniversary!!!!!

k that's all.

tatas.

DTM july 2004.

2005-07-06T02:23:00.000+08:00

just one word to describe the 1st 2 days of school.
TIRING.
the schedule is really gonna drain me out soon.
just 2 days of sch and yet i feel the strain.
not to mention it takes me more than 2 hrs to travel to and fro sch.
started off monday at 10.15am til 6.15pm.
and tuesday is worst.
started at 8.30am till 6.15pm.
tmr is no better. wednesdays starts at 8.30am till 4plus.
early u might say, but there's a catch.
there's 4.5 hrs of Business Law tmr.
..faints.
thursdays will start at 8.45am till 6plus too.
and fridays will start at 9am till 12.15.
..but. another catch.
fridays will be used for project work.
and yea, plenty of it is coming my way.
each subject can take up 2-3 assignments each.
how fun.
looking on the bright side of life; i wanna wish happy one year anniversary to DTM july 04.
happy advance anniversary to my jie on the 7th.
happy advance anniversary to my sweetheart on the 8th.
..and.
happy anniversary to priscilla on the 9th.
=)
lots of anniversaries yeah. LOL.
long day tmr.
btw, lessons are so boring. LOL.

long day..

2005-07-03T23:53:00.000+08:00

didn't go CB yesterday as most of my friends weren't there.
honey went though.
with his friends.

slept at 5 plus yesterday and woke up at 11am.
honey called and erm, he too just woke up.
so met him at outram b4 heading to harbourfront.

raining halfway.
left Sentosa around 8plus.
went to eat.
by then i was tired from walking.
went off from Harbourfront nearly at 9 plus.
took cab home with alan as i've school tmr.

tmr classes start at 10.15am right up to 6.15pm.
wowweee.
think this semester will pass by real fast becoz of the hectic schedule.
aniwae, tmr will be my 2nd year.
so thought of a resolution.
...and,
that is to study more and save more $.
LOL.

oklah, really tired.
will miss my bf for this whole week.
=(
Niteyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! =)

pretty boy;

2005-07-03T00:52:00.000+08:00

... For you.

i lie awake at night,see things in black and white.i've only got you inside my mind,you noe you have made me blind.
i lie awake and pray,that you will look my way.i have all this longing in my heart,i knew it righte from the start.
i used to write your name,and put it in a frame.and sometimes i think i hear you call,right from my bedroom wall.
you stay a little while,and touch me with your smile.and what can i say to make you mine,to reach you for you in time.
oh my pretty,pretty boy i love you like;i never ever love no1 before you.pretty, pretty boy of mine;jus tell me you love me too.
oh my pretty,pretty boy i need you;oh my pretty, pretty boy i do.let me inside..make me stay rite beside you.

so close to you;

2005-07-02T06:25:00.000+08:00

spend my fridae evening with honey.
reached CCK around 4.30pm. waited for him at the usual place.
a lady approached me and enquired whether i'm malay or chinese.
she speaks to me in chinese and i found myself answering back to her in english.
LOL. then she asked me how i manage to understand her when i say i'm not chinese.
haha. and guess what?
she asked me to pray for i-don't-know-what. still asked me to follow her go somewhere or what.
felt like running away. haha. trust him to be late.
hmph.
..and. guess what.
i saw honey's bro. LOL.
trust him to be late again.
double hmph.

he must be laughing when he reads this.
i shall call you next time when i'm at CT Hall.
haha.. luv ya aniwaes.

wanted to catch a movie but no time slot.
he bought his shades at dunno-where.
yea, cool on him but.. otherwise on me.
he must be laughing again.
didn't believe i look like that insect until i saw my own pic.
LOL.

met up with his friend and his fren's gf later on.
nice spending time with you dear.
though we did nothing much, it was well...
...comfortable and uplifting to be with you.

went home with his fren's gf in a cab.
might be going chinablack with honey and his frens later tonite.
and i can't believe i'm back to sch next week.
as in.
...1 more day??!
sunday to rest only. wow.
and honey's having his holiday.
why can't dtm and dcs have same timing holidays!
haiyah.

and to mya; i've read your blog. keke.
hope to be able to meet next sundae yar.
i'll make myself free.
for u and blur ain. plus that hot babe lia. keke.
miss u all. mwuahs.

might not be blogging after a few more entries.
cuz sch's gonna be pretty busy.
btw..
i've blog-hopped most of my fren's blog.
pretty touching entries they've got.
but the one from abijah's was touching.
goes something like.. ''after sometime you might get tired of each other but never give up on the one you really love.''
and yep, she's right.
honey; i'll never give you up.
not for anything else in the world.
i lurve you. and happy advance anniversary.

love me;

2005-07-01T03:24:00.000+08:00

..i lurve you
..as always.
like it's the first day
we
..met.

i want you.
to lurve me
..like you used to.

baby;
i've..
...missed you.
so bad.

time for a change;

2005-06-30T01:49:00.000+08:00

not as touching as the old one;

..but the layout isn't all that bad.

find the song quite nice.

..not as sad as the old one tho.

keke.

nothing can express how much he means to me.

nothing else can ever take his place.

..i feel so incomplete without him.

so..

..lost.

ever had that feeling?

i just no-one will.

unless.

...they fall in lurve.

hmms.. hope to see him soon.

it's been..

... days.

after nearly 4 months, i'm loving u more;

2005-06-29T07:19:00.000+08:00

hmms..

woke up a lil early today to wish my honey good luck for his exams.

got something to eat first before going back off to sleep.

kindda bored rite now as i can't seemed to get back to slp.

must have been a lil too full.

keke.

listening to yi lu shang bei.

thanks to my dearest jiejie who sent it over to me.

she sent me over the lyrics too.

plus translation in english.

so sweet.

you're just too nice. keke.

really got no plans today as my friends end school late.

hmms..

just a lil something i've been meaning to blog.

after birth, we all are hurled;
into an ever-changing world.
we live our lives, we learn to
love;
and are granted dreams from up
above.

but as we grow, we learn to see;
we're living in reality.

with talent squandered, forgotten dreams;

the world's a scary place, it seems.

for people who don't learn how to
fly;
they lose their dreams, and let them
die.

their favourite things, what they do best;

are lost and forgotten, thus laid to rest.

if you love music, learn to
play;
or if it's art, then draw each
day.

whatever you have the dream to do;

once it's found, keep it with you.

you'll meet with failure and stop to
cry;
but you can overcome it once you
try.

from these we can all learn to keep;

our treasures near, not buried deep.

i would never be able to grow up so
beautifully;
like a star i shone; rare yet
lovely

if it hadn't met you, the one i love so true;

thus my sweetheart, i'm most grateful to you.

just a note;

2005-06-28T00:50:00.000+08:00

number of views been going up.

just too fast.

why?

frustrated that you can't actually view it?

why only now?

why?

goodness.

initial d was nice.

never say a guy really cry.

over a girl before.

hmm..

tired.

going off to sleep.

tatas.

tough day;

2005-06-26T18:11:00.000+08:00

went off early to get breakfast for these hungry people at home

was going to be late, so didn't take any breakfast

around 1pm, went off to REDS.

was surprised to see so many appointments.

hmm.. went home around 5 plus.

mom wasn't home.

and breakfast was already cold.

called her up and decided to meet for quick dinner.

she's werking tonight so we have to rush tru dinner.

supper is only one call away if i'm still hungry.

good to have my cuzzin back.

keke.

overall not a great day todae.

*yawns.

gonna meet him tmrw.

argh.

miss him so.

those times;these times

2005-06-26T01:28:00.000+08:00

in the flashback:

friends for a few years, and she fled away with new friends.new friends that she hung out with. even told them the secrets i used to tell her.my problems. my life.why ruin it for me.friends for so many years. why this?!thought i could get tru it. but i can't.

the present:
pretended nothing happened.forgave her. but
perceptions of friends changed.for all these years; if any1 would to make use of
me.would i noe? i've been so dumb. so dumb.i just want friends i can really
trust. went off to change my no w/o telling most of them.and he just can't
understand.i dun need friends just for hi n a bye.i want a friend for
keeps.

today; someone i knew so well; long time ago,
said:
" don't think you're always right when you're
not.learn from experience. childish behaviour from you is something i don't get
often.why push all your friends away?just because your life now seems complete
with them and him.it just seems so. i know u'll only want true friends.you'd not
want friends to make use of u then leave you.but how can u forget us? how could
you?? all i want you to do is think. and not take everything for
granted"

i've realized that i'm so wrong. not every friend is the same as her.not every friend will leave you.stranded. i'm sorry poji,awi,hadi,hafiz,ayid. (for never being there on ur bdae's).i'm sorry lia. (for never being there for ur upcoming A's)i'm sorry ain.mya,lav and meiyan. (for never able to spent those times together).i'm sorry Honey.i should have understood what you're trying to say.
i'm sorry...

friends.

really am.

pms alert;

2005-06-25T00:07:00.000+08:00

my cousin called mom up a couple of times.

i wonder whats going on.

must be regarding my aunt.

i hope she's okie.

life is too precious for her to go.

i just hope she's gonna be fine.

i hate having pms.

these mood swings cause me to be irritable easily.

i get angry for no reason.

argh. i hate it.

been having these cramps since yesterday night.

feeling nausea too.

couldn't have been food poisoning as i've eaten nothing since yesterday.

might be my gastric acting up again.

or maybe it's just stomach cramp.

i don't know what's happening to me.

my mom commented i look a lil pale these days.

told her it was lack of sleep.

which i think so too. since i sleep like a pig.

slept after i got home just now.

got home in a cab.

traffic jam. goodness. felt really nausea with those closed doors.

closed my eyes and eventually drifted to sleep.

woke up and was already at Simei.

went back to shower and sleep again.

just woke up around 11pm.

called him up; good luck for tmrw.

felt okay for a few minutes.

then these dizziness came back.

gotta go sleep i think.

if i can't take it then i'll wake mom up.

CGH is just next door.

have a great wkend.

movie date;

2005-06-21T03:33:00.000+08:00

it's not what i am underneath but what i do
that DEFINES me.

reach home quite early, around 10plus.

thanks for the movie dear.

and thanks for the cab fare home.

really lurve you.

gonna miss him.

hais.

sorry to trouble you to hand up my project for me.

sorry that all your report is gone.

appreciate all the things you've done for me.

take care of yourself ya.

and good luck for saturday.

i'll be there in your heart honey!

smuacks.

love you.

never gonna let you go.

i promise.

saturday nite;

2005-06-19T16:19:00.000+08:00

goosh. i just woke up.

woke up by his call.

went cck yesterday before going Petals EC.

took a BUS to Treasury Building.

dinner ends around 10pm.

waited for Alan at Somerset; and we went CB.

met up with a couple of his friends before going in.

stayed there till around 5am.

went home in a cab with Martin's friend.

and.

i'm really hungry.

and.

*yawns*

gonna grab something to eat.

bathe.

and sleep again.

have a great holiday!

ending e semester;

2005-06-16T23:25:00.000+08:00

just 2 more papers to go.

Friday:

Quality Service in Hospitality.

1pm-3pm.

Saturday:

Principles of Communication.

10am-12pm.

two more projects to go.

24 june 2oo5.

by 5pm.

Got my next term's schedule already.

1. Front Office Operations

2. Housekeeping Operations

3. Writing Skills

3. Microeconomics

4. Hospitality Law

5. Tourism Studies

6. Integrated Resorts

Wow. a subject just on the upcoming casino.

Going Petals EC on saturday.

Chinablack anyone?

from me to you;

2005-06-11T16:50:00.000+08:00

two tear drops were floating down the river. one teardrop said to the other,
"i'm the teardrop of a girl who loved a man and lost him. who are you?"
"i'm the teardrop of the man who regret letting a girl go....."
'she' teardrop consoled, "there would come a time when we have to stop loving someone because we found out that they'd be happier if we let them go..."
'he' teardrop replied, "but then you'll know that you miss someone very much when everytime you think of that person, your heart breaks into pieces and just a quick 'Hello' from that person brings the broken pieces back..."
'she' teardrop said, "it's really painful to say goodbye to someone else that you don't want to let go; but it's even more painful to ask someone to stay if you can never make the relationship work out the way it should be."
'she' continued, "LOVE? it's kind of complicated,but i'll tell you this... the second you're willing to make yourself miserable to make someone else happy, that's love right there...."
'he' teardrop pondered and said, "you know, if i had the letters "HRT", i can add "EA" to get a "HEART" or a "U" and get "HURT". but i'd rather choose "U" and get "HURT" than have a "HEART" without "U"...
'she' teardrop smiled and replied, "giving someone all your love is not an assurance that she will love you back. don't expect love in return, wait for it to grow in her heart, if it doesn't, be contented it grows in yours."
'he' teardrop continued, "she told me once, do not be too good, i will miss you. don't be too caring; i might like you. don't be too sweet; i might fall for you."
'she' teardrop smiled and said, "A heart truly in love never loses hope but always believes."
'She' teardrop continued, "if you love her please let her know because it hurts to love when you have to go. take care of me; don't go away because if you love me, you will stay... i love you and do you know why? you got me when you first said 'Hi'
'he' teardrop said, "you are brave 'she' teardrop,now i know it's always better to have found the courage to love even if you lose it in the end rather than never found love because you were too afraid of the challenge."
'he' teardrop continued further, "did you know that the expression "Nothing" is the subconscious mind's way of saying I Love You... that's what ido,i told her NOTHING and because of that i lost her even though i love her... i cry for the time that she was almost mine, i cry for the memories i've left behind, i cry for the pain, the lost, the old and the new. i cry for the times i thought i had her!"
'she' teardrop consoled, "Relationships are like glass, sometimes it is better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together,or worse, have nothing strong to bind it together.you never lose in loving. you only lose in holding back."
'he' teardrop cried,"Now i know, i have learned.don't throw your back to love when it's already in front of you, don't drive it away from you becauseif you did, someday you'll think again why you let love fly away when it was once next to YOU..."

*honey;your princess just want to tell you that she lurves you.

touched//happy anniversary;

2005-06-08T00:40:00.000+08:00

just got back from his EC.

guess what?

i got back my 7610!! hehe..

the librarian returned it to me.. sum1 found it.. so sweet..

but i changed my number.

cuz my starhub contract is over 2 yrs already.

haha.. will give u guys my number asap.

and.. tmrw class at 1030am.

wowweee. can wake up at 8am!!

oh...

Happy 3 months Anniversary Honeypie..

Lurve ya.. *mwuah*

and i guess i won't be updating much in the days to come cuz i'll be having my exams nxt week..

okie dokie.. so, today wasn't tat bad afterall.. but a bit too rush for me as i have to rush down to take my new number (thanks to Eli for choosing it) and then have to rush to Rosette.

but in all.. oh well.. i'm just so touched to get back my hp..

nitey niteeeeeeeeeee!!!!

sentimental value;

2005-06-06T19:31:00.000+08:00

i just lost my pink 7610.

pls return it back to me..

it means a lot. :'(

btw, i cut off my line already..

will update u guys if i have a new no..

missing pieces of me;

2005-06-06T17:00:00.000+08:00

i'm

so...

gonna

miss

my boyfriend

for the

whole

entire

week.

*sobs sobs*

anyways, good luck for your event catering.
and.. happy advance anniversary to you my dearest cuppycake sweetheart.
hope you'll like the fairytale gift. and...

i just miss you lah. =(

sick..

2005-06-05T15:34:00.000+08:00

Madagascar is such a cute movie. hehs.

hais...

Next week will be hell.

Besides projects and presentations, i'll have to prepare for my exams.

and Honey's gonna be busy with his Event Catering too.

What a draggy week ahead.

my eyes are dry. can't wear contacts. guess i'll have to stick to my glasses.

and i've been coughing for a week.

i'm feeling pretty sick.. :'(

semester stress;

2005-06-04T20:01:00.000+08:00

1 more week to the exams. not even hitting the books yet.4 projects and 1 presentation this week.total mess.
my brains going on a whirlwind.didn't bring home my communication book.and the 2,000 word essay is killing me.
someone please get the load off my shoulder.conquering the realm of stress is never easy.stress lead to bad mood swings. argh.hate the awful feeling. getting paranoid for allthe wrong reasons. :'(
guess what? yea, anniversary coming soon.i know i've shouted at u. and i'm sorry.no words to describe how much i love u.but i do. *muacks.
but.. but.. i need a break. and i need to eat. i'm hungry.and i miss him. i really do miss being around him.and i miss my friends. sorry, i've been busy.
*sob sob*please, let this semester be over. i need theholiday. argh.

..horoscope-fun;

2005-05-29T16:30:00.000+08:00

hmm.. did a lil horoscope thinggy..
did one for honeypie too.. hahs.. told ya u would be that hairy lil creature..
hehs.. love you.. (*v*)

Star Wars Horoscope for Capricorn

http://www.quizdiva.net/swhoroscopes/capricorn.jpg">>You%20have%20a%20ton%20of%20ambition%20and%20inexhaustible%20desire%20to%20reach%20your%20goals.You%20are%20very%20loyal,%20going%20to%20great%20lengths%20to%20help%20someone%20out.You%20are%20a%20very%20social%20unit,%20winning%20the%20hearts%20of%20many%20with%20your%20cute%20personality.Star%20wars%20character%20you%20are%20most%20like:%20R2D2

..datelines;

2005-05-28T12:00:00.000+08:00

Wedding Banquet Project - 24 may o5
Wedding Banquet Presentation - o3 june o5
Food & Beverage Cost Control - o3 june o5
Executive Summary (English) - o8 june o5
Quality Service In Hospitality & Tourism - 1o june o5
Principles Of Communication (Individual) - 1o june o5

datelines after datelines.. more like dead-lines to me.
the feeling of having to do projects with less people contributing is worst.
i'm sick of all these. what a draggy semester.
i'm just so tireeeeeed.. =(

*the girl in my mirror;

2005-05-22T20:24:00.000+08:00

i stared at her. behind her smile, her laughters, there's sadness. her eyes betrayed it all. the warmth in her presence is no longer there. it's as if she lost all the light she had in her. she turned to me. looking into my eyes, she said;

"love is special. take a risk. love is not something u can afford to miss. you're a girl, once in our lives, we will come across 3 types of men. one, whom u love so dear, but he does not love u the same amount. two, is someone who took ur heart away and never gave it back to u. and three, is someone u'll spend ur lifetimewith. be patient. asked yourself whether u've met him. tolerance is another. no relationship is ever without its ups and downs. forgive and let it go. every girl has to be strong. love is all about giving and never asking for anything in return."

she looked away. i could feel her tears. i wanted to hug her and tell her everything's going to be alryte. but in the midst of my tears,she's gone. the air is thick. will she ever be fine?

i blinked. deep in thoughts, i recalled the things she said. few moments passed. i asked myself;

"i think of him when i'm lonely. i think of him when i'm happy. i think of him whenever we're apart. and i think of him all the time.he's someone i feel most comfortable with. he's someone who can make me laugh. he's everything i wanted. everything i desired.i may not show it often, but i really cared about him. in a lot of ways, he has touched my heart. i am willing,to spent every waking moment with him. i don't want to lose someone;like him. "

i whispered these words that i want him to hear."..my dear, forgive me. i'm sorry. i won't let u go..i love you.."

with that, just like her, i turned and left.

2005-05-16T16:27:00.000+08:00

--- sat.
reached sentosa @ 5pm on sat afternn.e bus refused to alight us @ e bus-stop so we had to go another round.then waited for a van to transport us to sunset bay. gdness, what a ride. like being coped up in a cage. eee.started service frm 7pm to 2am. in e middle of service, it rained. was drenched coz i was standing @ e buffet line.then e guests danced til around 2am. music stopped only ard 3am.packed everything and was off home in a cab @ shangri-la.reached home @ 4 plus. wasn't really tired. maybe coz of e $. hahs.

---sun.
was supposed to meet them @ 4.30pm @ PS cafe cartel.as usual, was late. sorry, i 4got e tics. hehs.met up with e dcs ppl & proceeded to paradigm.congrats glenda! she won ms popularity & 2nd runner-up. stayed till abt midnite and decided 2 go home.went hm in a cab with danny, sarah & cecelia. tmrw got classes @ 9am and there's flaring/bar course tmrw. going off to sleep soon. nitey all.. hope u've enjoyed ur weekend.i'm so shagged. *yawns.
but i miss him.

happy birthday sweetie.

2005-05-11T10:08:00.000+08:00

honeypie..

happy 18th birthday..

double celebration for you rite. lucky you.

hope you like e "box".

have fun and enjoy yourself today.

dear..

whatever happens, i'll always stand by you.

and i wanna give you something else on your birthday.

that is..

a simple " i love you ".

that doesn't comes from my mouth..

but from deep within my heart.

all at one time..

2005-05-09T20:28:00.000+08:00

i don't think i ever fell asleep.
woke up early just to be reminded of yesterday's happenings.
hmm.. millions of thoughts crossed my mind.

cuzzin.. u must be strong.. i know that by now.. you'll be already be on the way..
it's not worth e tears u're crying now.. pls, tell me u're alright.. remember that i'll always be there for you.. the four of us will always be.. we'll stand by you. it just makes me so sad when u're crying your tears.. we all love you my dearest.. *hugs.

meeting ain @ town later.. thanks for accompanying me.. it's nice to have a friend to cheer you up now and then.

"i will answer all your wishes if u asked me to, but if u deny me one of ur kisses, don't know what i'll do. so hold
me close and say 3 words like you use to do."

rainy day..

2005-05-08T03:30:00.000+08:00

hmms.. a rainy sunday..
aniyway..
Happy Mother's Day 2oo5..
"Nothing beats a mother's love" =)

and yeah..
Happy Anniversary too..
("v") you..
i miss you.. mwuahh..

tomorrow classes will start late..
hopefully ending early..
coz there's no Quality Service..
there's Accounting test tomorrow tho..

got the tickets to the beauty pageant too..
this sunday @ paradigm..
free flow from 1opm onwards..
that's all.. update later..

*hugs.

something new

2005-05-07T19:01:00.000+08:00

hmms... new blog..
anyway, congrats to ain for passing her results. told ya you'll do well.
thanks for the song too. will update in e days to come.